Gossip

A Study on Gossip

Word Study

There are 4 places in the NT where the word "gossip" is used: Rom. 1:29; 2 Cor. 12:2; 1 Tim. 5:13; and 3 Jn. 1:10.

Rom. 1:29 and 2 Cor. 12:2- The words for gossip in are the same in both verses: "psithuristas." This word means "whisperer, secret slander." It is used in Eccl. 10:11 as "a murmured enchantment." Basically, it means things that people say in secret, and just between one another.

1 Tim. 5:13- the word for gossip is "phluareo." It means "babbling, to talk nonsense."

3 Jn. 1:10- the word for gossip is actually a phrase: "phluaroi." It means "words against."

Therefore, "gossip" can be defined as "nonsense, speaking against someone's character, secret talk, etc."

Application

I believe that we can apply this learning to our lives. To me, this is what gossip is: "talking about someone or people when you have no business talking about them." Now, if John Doe comes to me, and tells me his problem, and asks me to discuss it with another so that I can bring him a good answer, then that is not gossip. However, if I overhear or observe John Doe's behavior (when he hasn't confided in me), and I talk about him to someone else, then that is gossip.

If I am speaking about someone I don't know that well, and it is not good, then it is gossip.

If I am talking about someone, or a situation, and I am not a part of the solution, it is gossip.

If I am part of the situation, but am bringing it to people who shouldn't be involved, then that is gossip.

If we notice a behavior in someone that bothers us, then we should first go to that person (Matt. 18:15-20). If we go to other people first, tell them, gather counsel and support, and then talk to the person in question, it is gossip. It is a sin. Now, the behavior or situation may indeed be bad, but it is our responsibility to talk to that person first. If we respect them, then we will do that. There may be some reasons for the actions or situation that they are in.

If anyone comes to me with a problem about someone, or a situation, my first response will be "did you talk to them already?" If the answer is "no", then I will not even hear the problem, I will direct you to talk to that person.

Being Judgmental

Sometimes we can tend to be a bit judgmental if we are on a better walk than someone else. I am probably the most guilty of anyone I know when it comes to being judgmental...I just don't voice it that much. If there is one thing that I have learned from Pastor Bruce, it is that it is better always to extend more mercy to people than rules. I think of God and all the mercy He has stored up for me, and I am overwhelmed and bothered by my sin. However, all this is not to say that I won't talk to someone if I see a big pitfall that they are heading for. I will, but I'll do it through love and mercy, and talk to them first.

Please pray for one another. If someone is slipping on their walk, pray for them more than anything else. Love them. Remember the mercy that God had for us. He loved us when we were still His enemies (Rom. 5:10)... how is it that we can be so hard on one another when we are brothers and sisters in the Lord. Now, please don't use this as an excuse to get away with anything that you want! That is stupid.

What If Someone Talks to Me About Something They Feel I Have Done?

If someone does come and talk to you about something that you have done that has bothered them, please don't dismiss it without praying about it. Portray that great humility of Php. 2:3-5. Pray about it, seek God through His Word, and try to discover if you have offended them. We always need to be teachable.